oh well
and so block leave comes to an end.
time really flew. my dad was in hospital the whole time; a roller-coaster of emotions as you'd expect, what with him getting baptised on the 13th (if i remember correctly) and receiving last rites this wednesday! i spent lots of time shuttling back and forth, camping at hospital 2 nights (wed and thurs), and as you might expect block leave didn't feel like rest for me at all, it was mentally draining and an emotional nightmare. at least he's a lot better now, and i feel a bit more at ease leaving him for a 2-week confinement.
sispec. another blow. i'd hoped so much for ocs, even though the odds were stacked against me. my fitness is rock-bottom and bmt was already trying for me (and with my dad being terminally ill my mind was weighed down with lots of stuff). no matter, i'll try my best; i have to.
-----
it was a real consolation going out with the few friends i managed to squeeze time out for.
YO - fun times again. island creamery with zh/sh... talked some cock, hung loose for a while. saw my section. coming along, you guys. if any of you drop by here: i'm proud of you lot despite all that i say. =)
geog guys - crazy swell time. sweet. i guess my home, being my home, didn't have anything to offer by way of entertainment, but you lot were cool about it and didn't make me feel like a damn no-life fucktard. cool stuff cooking for you guys. first time i did steaks too. haha yeah i monopolised the kitchen because my mom would disown me if her immaculate sparkling pride and glory got sullied by one stray spot of oil or herb. coolio board games from wally really saved the day. haha xy got pwnt in puerto rico (a damn complex board game with about a billion rules) and i surprise surprise came out second despite being the underdog the whole time. and no i didn't mind being left out of the convos, it's fine by me lah. nothing to say about soccer anyway. glad you guys liked my tiramisu and yeah it was really a fuxload of alcohol. i could taste the alcohol fumes, i swear.
-----
sigh what else. talking to friends really helped. what would i do, where would i be without you guys? those little snippets of convo all over the place that rescued me from depression... those smses that might not have seemed much... the emails that came and brought a smile and a tear to my tired face... thx to all of you.
at least my (real life) bro (adrian)'s back from america. it would be hell trying to explain how he's my bro when he's a whole generation apart (complicated family history), but yeah we do connect despite the age gap and the number of times we've seen each other in the last 10 years (two or three times in total i think). but yeah my dad's in safe hands now... sigh i'm just a tad disappointed that he prefers adrian's company to mine now, but of course he hasn't seen him for so long either i dont really mind. at any rate i was really happy to see him again. funny how i should be an only child in spirit but not, technically, in reality.
and so i'm 11 hours away from sispec, while my friends are the same duration away from ocs. much regret and sadness. wishing them all the best in my thoughts, while praying for the best for them and myself. hope i can loosen up and connect with people.
oh well. bed beckons - my own, for the last time before 12 sad and lonely nights.
time really flew. my dad was in hospital the whole time; a roller-coaster of emotions as you'd expect, what with him getting baptised on the 13th (if i remember correctly) and receiving last rites this wednesday! i spent lots of time shuttling back and forth, camping at hospital 2 nights (wed and thurs), and as you might expect block leave didn't feel like rest for me at all, it was mentally draining and an emotional nightmare. at least he's a lot better now, and i feel a bit more at ease leaving him for a 2-week confinement.
sispec. another blow. i'd hoped so much for ocs, even though the odds were stacked against me. my fitness is rock-bottom and bmt was already trying for me (and with my dad being terminally ill my mind was weighed down with lots of stuff). no matter, i'll try my best; i have to.
-----
it was a real consolation going out with the few friends i managed to squeeze time out for.
YO - fun times again. island creamery with zh/sh... talked some cock, hung loose for a while. saw my section. coming along, you guys. if any of you drop by here: i'm proud of you lot despite all that i say. =)
geog guys - crazy swell time. sweet. i guess my home, being my home, didn't have anything to offer by way of entertainment, but you lot were cool about it and didn't make me feel like a damn no-life fucktard. cool stuff cooking for you guys. first time i did steaks too. haha yeah i monopolised the kitchen because my mom would disown me if her immaculate sparkling pride and glory got sullied by one stray spot of oil or herb. coolio board games from wally really saved the day. haha xy got pwnt in puerto rico (a damn complex board game with about a billion rules) and i surprise surprise came out second despite being the underdog the whole time. and no i didn't mind being left out of the convos, it's fine by me lah. nothing to say about soccer anyway. glad you guys liked my tiramisu and yeah it was really a fuxload of alcohol. i could taste the alcohol fumes, i swear.
-----
sigh what else. talking to friends really helped. what would i do, where would i be without you guys? those little snippets of convo all over the place that rescued me from depression... those smses that might not have seemed much... the emails that came and brought a smile and a tear to my tired face... thx to all of you.
at least my (real life) bro (adrian)'s back from america. it would be hell trying to explain how he's my bro when he's a whole generation apart (complicated family history), but yeah we do connect despite the age gap and the number of times we've seen each other in the last 10 years (two or three times in total i think). but yeah my dad's in safe hands now... sigh i'm just a tad disappointed that he prefers adrian's company to mine now, but of course he hasn't seen him for so long either i dont really mind. at any rate i was really happy to see him again. funny how i should be an only child in spirit but not, technically, in reality.
and so i'm 11 hours away from sispec, while my friends are the same duration away from ocs. much regret and sadness. wishing them all the best in my thoughts, while praying for the best for them and myself. hope i can loosen up and connect with people.
oh well. bed beckons - my own, for the last time before 12 sad and lonely nights.
Labels: Life
posted by Unknown at
8:16 pm
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